Le Coucher

Kona-Sunset-wedding-photography-

Hello, you.

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I heard you’re getting married. Just saw a random pre-wedding picture of you and her.

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You seemed happy. Her skin glowed against the last rays of light from the sunset… And she seemed happy,too…

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Several years ago, it was what we planned — to be wed… But now, you’ll be wed to someone else. Someone who’s not me.

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The sunset? It was part of it, too. You knew how I love sunsets…

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I can still remember the way you whispered in my ear that you’ll marry me under a sunset…

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It’s ironic that I am looking at a very new photograph and yet it seems like it’s all too familiar, which makes me feel nostalgic and melancholic at the same time…

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But…

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Why am I even writing this in the first place?

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I dreamt of you again.

It was weird…

I never expected you to be there yet it seemed as if you were to stay by my side not only for that swift moment but till forever.

You held my hand, and I felt that a certain warmth rushed in to touch every single cell in my heart. You said you’ll be back for good, and that you won’t be leaving– not anymore. That was an awfully familiar promise of long ago, a promise that ended up getting broken.

As your lips moved to form the words that affirmed you will stay, I held my breath. I cried… But why did I? Was it because of relief? Of an intense joy? Or because of an immense sadness, knowing at the back of my mind that everything will melt away as soon as I open my eyes to wake up and  be back in reality?

Everything is so different when I am awake. Yes… Everything…

For a moment, I felt you were real. I felt your heart belonged to mine once more…

…but then again, it was only a dream.

Nothing more.

Nothing less…